Close Talkers, Mouth Breathers and others...

Close Talkers -

Ever have someone invade your personal space to the point that you want to smack them? I've tried numerous ways to get them to step back so I don't have to see or smell what they had for breakfast (most notably a Venti, Non-Caff Latte, shot of espresso, with Equal and no whip).

I've found the most effective maneuver is to place your foot out in front of you about 18 inches. That way when they try to get closer, your foot and leg are in the way and they can't get up on you. First, however, you have to make that quick step back and place your foot out there defensively BEFORE they follow you and pop your personal bubble.

I have a large personal bubble (unless we're dating and then it becomes almost miniscule)so to have a person raid it, is VERY uncomfortable for me.


Mouth Breathers -

Have you ever looked around at people and noticed the slack jawed, blank faced expression on so many in public? What is that?

Unless someone has a cold or some other "official" breathing difficulty, mouth breathing is just unnecessary. I'd like to walk up on a MB, place my index finger under their chin and gently lift it up so that their lips meet.

I'd like to think that the mean IQ doesn't have any correlation with mouth breathers, but I fear I am wrong.


Proportionately Incorrect and bad clothing options -

There's a disgusting restaurant here in my town that puts out a statue of Santa Claus each year. He's short and round, as well he should be, but his head is too small. We drive by intentionally every year just to see "Microcephalic Santa".

Why, oh why, did the 70's pseudo fashion come back in? It was UGLY back then!!! Its worse now, in my opinion. Namely because people that choose to wear the flare legged, low rise jeans, 4 sizes too small, DON'T LOOK GOOD!!! Now they actually have a name for the phenomenon -- "muffin tops". Um, I wear clothes that DON'T accentuate my fluffiness - but that's just me.


The Painfully Insecure -

I don't pretend to be completely happy with who I am. But I don't need constant reassurance that every person I meet, likes me.

I've decided to make t-shirts for every person that demands I tell them I like them. One for each of us.

Theirs -- "Please, like me!"

Mine -- "I will. From over THERE!"

Law of Repulsion

I think, subconsciously, I practice the law of repulsion. Everything I want, I still don't get...and everything I don't want, plagues me like a rash.

Loki, the Norwegian god of mischief, must be a late ancestor that's "looking out for me". Thanks...not funny.

I just sucked up some unknown object (swear, never saw it) while vacuuming. Trying to clean up debris, and the debris cleaner spews...debris.

Upon mopping, I'm expecting the mop head will fly off in one direction while I'm moving on a slick surface in the opposite.

Better go find some cleats...